Transformational Relationships: From Crisis to Rebirth

With Kevin Helas

Welcome to another episode of the Soul Surgery Podcast. I am so happy that you tuned in to listen to this very special episode that is so close to my heart and aligns with the personal journey I write about in my new book “SURRENDER: Break Free of Your Past, Realise Your Power, Live Beyond Your Story”.

For the first time ever, my husband Kevin and I sit together to speak publicly about the breakdown of our marriage and how that crisis in our relationship turned out to be one of the greatest and deepest phases of transformation and growth for us both and for our individual selves.

I feel that this is an ideal time for us to share this episode with you considering the kind of immense pressure people have been feeling in their relationships because of the lockdown. The last year of lockdown has intensified frustrations within relationships to such an extent that it has felt like a crash course in intense isolated relationship.

We dive so deeply into the complex layers of what creates the vicious cycles of misunderstandings, emotional struggles and repeated patterns and pains that cause so much strain between two people that are meant to love each other. How unconsciously, in trying to match up to the pictures in our mind of what love is, what marriage and relationships ‘should’ be, we end up suppressing so much of our true individual selves.

We speak about how all this creates blocks to truly giving and receiving love.  And how the unhealed wounds of our childhood are contaminating our experience of our partners here in the present and how to heal this

And the enormous act of SURRENDER that was required for us to truly allow a rebirth of our marriage to become possible.

This story is a taste of the deeper writing I share with you in my new book SURRENDER.

Pre-Sales of my book SURRENDER

If you too feel ready to re-create your relationships or your life by breaking free of old patterns on a holistic level, across mind, body and soul, I invite you to pre-order my book SURRENDER.

SURRENDER is a book that will walk you through a life changing process of maturation.  Of breaking free of the vicious cycle of repeated stuck patterns, stories and belief systems, trauma and ancestral wounds.

A book where I guide you through a deep healing journey of SURRENDERING of who you are NOT so that you can unfurl into who you were BORN TO BE.



  • How deeply rooted memories and traumas from childhood experiences were affecting our marriage but we couldn’t see it until we were willing to truly surrender to a much deeper process.
  • Trust and feeling safe in relationships becomes available the more you are both willing to truly tell the truth about yourselves with the other.
  • The conditioning of relationship that has been sold to people and requires the two human beings to somehow suppress themselves in some way to be able to allow the relationship to work.
  • How in a relationship you have 3 entities – each individual and then the relationship itself which is an entity on its own – all 3 must be worked on to continue evolving, healing, growth and alignment.
  • It often appears that the other person is to blame and yet as we explore, we realise that our reactions are mechanical and we stop seeing the other person and vice versa.
  • How space apart and doing the deep healing work created a completely new dynamic, new love and new relationship to unfold.